the LADDER STORE!!!

Now that the dragon has been slain, it's off to the store to buy some ladders... after many, MANY miles of running, Supertroll arrived at the ladder store... which had a, "all trolls, no matter how super they be, needs to get the hell on, cuz we don't sell ladders to toll trolls..." 

this infuriated the troll, so, naturally, he picked up the benz dealership next door and tossed it through the window... he then ate the stupid employees at the store, grabbed a particularly saucy benz, loaded it up with roughly 18 thousand ladders, and drove up a nearby mountain where he began preparations for his masterful plan...

after stacking all eighteen thousand ladders end to end, he began his ascent to the heavens...

unfortunately, it turns out that he was six ladders short of getting to the heaven that he wanted, and was faced with the part of heaven where all the naughty catholic priests go when they die... (also known as neverland ranch...)

of course, Supertroll is very intolerant of raping little boys... (unless it is in the privacy of one's own home... and in the ear...) so he began pulling priests out of little buttholes all over this poor place... (it turns out, it's also the level of hell that little tattling catholic choir boys go to... funny how god works like that...)  the troll forgot to calculate the magnitude of suction from pulling the priests out of these now gaping orrifaces, and was pulled into another dimensoin...

who would have known that inside every catholic choir boy's rectum is the set of a porn... tune in next time!!!

the LADDER STORE!!!

Now that the dragon has been slain, it's off to the store to buy some ladders... after many, MANY miles of running, Supertroll arrived at the ladder store... which had a, "all trolls, no matter how super they be, needs to get the hell on, cuz we don't sell ladders to toll trolls..." 

this infuriated the troll, so, naturally, he picked up the benz dealership next door and tossed it through the window... he then ate the stupid employees at the store, grabbed a particularly saucy benz, loaded it up with roughly 18 thousand ladders, and drove up a nearby mountain where he began preparations for his masterful plan...

after stacking all eighteen thousand ladders end to end, he began his ascent to the heavens...

unfortunately, it turns out that he was six ladders short of getting to the heaven that he wanted, and was faced with the part of heaven where all the naughty catholic priests go when they die... (also known as neverland ranch...)

of course, Supertroll is very intolerant of raping little boys... (unless it is in the privacy of one's own home... and in the ear...) so he began pulling priests out of little buttholes all over this poor place... (it turns out, it's also the level of hell that little tattling catholic choir boys go to... funny how god works like that...)  the troll forgot to calculate the magnitude of suction from pulling the priests out of these now gaping orrifaces, and was pulled into another dimensoin...

who would have known that inside every catholic choir boy's rectum is the set of a porn... tune in next time!!!

shit-hatted...

The dragon let out a mighty, fiery roar as he flailed around trying to get the troll's shit off his head... This pissed the troll off, as he got much of the shit flung off onto him...

And, of course, the troll had to get retribution for this unjustified slinging of shit... I mean, c'mon... it's not a fucking monkey. it's a fully grown fucking dragon... So he grabbed at the dragon's ballsack, as he assumed it was a man dragon... but instead of ripping a handful of nuts as he had wished, he was sucked into a different, shtinky, slimy world... (Much like the fabled fat friend's hoagie...)

In the confusion, the troll swam straight into the dragon's stomache... he was hungry by now, so he ate some of the dragon's stomache lining... This made the dragon vomit, and the troll was put into his mouth, where he ripped out one of the dragon's massive teeth and stabbed the shit out of the dragon's tongue... the tooth was so sharp and long that it went through the tongue and the bottom of the dragon's mouth, then killed some little bitch in china...

well... so much for that rookie dragon... ON TO THE LADDER STORE!!!

Supertroll!!!

there would be an update about life here, but fuck it...

Supertroll then decided that, with his new power of amazing  tolletry, he would go for the most majestic toll in the history of tolling EVER!!!

He began a long, tedious march towards a ladder store, where he would buy many ladders, in hopes of reaching heaven... while he was jumping over a mountain, he ran across a knight fighting a dragon...

"STAND BACK!!!" shouted the knight... this angered Supertroll... if that foolish peasent-turned-hero thought he could tell a troll what to do, he had another thing coming...

"NO!!!! you stand back, and then give me three fiddy..."

"What???" the knight had no money, and was therefore shocked at the request...

"give me three fiddy, or I'mma swallow you whole..."

"but I don't have it..."

With one mighty swoop of his left hand, the troll scooped up the knight... "NOOO!!!" the little bitch screamed... and, as the troll swallowed him whole, he could do nothing but scream all the way down...

now, as anyone could imagine, when one eats a fully grown male whole, one proceeeds to shit a brick, which supertroll did.... right on the dragon's head...

WHAT WILL HAPPEN NOW THAT THE DRAGON HAS BEEN SHIT-CAPPED???

the troll...

So, before I start ripping it up on part 2 of tollin it up, a SHORT update on my life... Sorry travis... I have to inform you somehow...

Broke up with Amy, got a tattoo... see!!! now that wasn't so bad, was it???

So the toll trolls got into an argument over who should recieve a toll in such a situation... eventually, the argument became an all out brawl... of course, the trolls both pulled out their whoop-ass sticks and began.. well, whoopin ass...

the battle ensued for 299 years, nonstop... (minus a few potty and waffle house breaks..) until our hero's club snapped in half... in all the confusion of a troll's beat-y death rod snapping, the crappy, lesser new troll jumped onto the now dagger-like club of Supertroll, who will now be referred to as supertroll for the rest of his days...

after much man-crying, (a lot like woman taking a dump with blood for tears...) shit troll exploded... then imploded... then turned into a big pile of cat crap... then ate lunch and went straight to hell... and Supertroll stole all his cash and rights to tolling the land, which gave him super-tolling power!!!

TO BE CONTINUED!!!